If it is one thing that is hard to define in life it is, Purpose. Many of you find that after careers end, children grow and are eventually gone, and the house suddenly seems too big for one or two, then you question purpose. When life’s purpose changes, the questions emerge. “If I am not the caretaker, who am I?” or, “If I am not the teacher, who am I?”, or “If I am not the doting mother or the providing father, who am I?” Many struggle with this notion of self-identity wrapped in roles, successes, trophies, or publications. You want to be remembered for an award, a promotion, a position or contribution. Your goal may be not to impress but you desire a change in the world, a spark of inspiration to move others in your community to better relations, increased access, equality. Either way, purpose gets defined as something to obtain.
It is a mistake to think that Purpose is a destination. You are always on purpose, in purpose and living through purpose. Purpose is the reason you Journey. It is a surrender to the choice that you decided to live life in a human body in a spiritual world and in this human experience you are going to have varied journeys.” You probably recognize by now that your path switches, has multiple destinations, turnoff, and many obstacles. Yet, you said ‘yes’ to that journey. It is in discovering more about you, your surroundings, how deep your heart can feel, how wide your mind can expand and how vast your possibilities are which bring you closer to the realization of purpose. It is those of you who consistently doubt yourselves that may not realize purpose has always been a part of you. “It is not reachable,” you say, “I don’t know why I am here, or what my calling is.” You can have goals, but don’t let them define your destination. Your life deserves room for failure.
You see, there is no purpose that isn’t already you. Perhaps you get tired, feel like giving up, and want life to happen to you, instead of through you. This is when you feel like a failure and wish passion would come back to you because Passion is a fire that lights your way. It is a candle of hope, surrender, love and gratitude that keeps you moving forward. While there may be moments that grief or loss appear and almost debilitate, consider it a break from passion. Give yourself permission to slow down, and be human. There may be trauma or tragedy and you wish to question, again, “What is my Purpose, why is this happening to me?” Accept that you are still living on purpose. Life itself is a gift given. Scientist friends may disagree and explain any type of life’s events as simply coincidence and self-will. According to them, there is no such thing as destiny. But, destiny is simply events that happen in a certain sequence and need to happen in order for your life to occur, or continue. Destiny is another reason for your journey. You agreed to surrender to where life is going to take you. Unfortunately, what I see in my Coaching and Social Work, it is sometimes toward the end of life that others realize they could not have directed all those events without the cooperation, interplay, conversation, and agreement to destiny. Events needed to happen, in the way they happened, to bring you where you are today. This seems far removed from science, my friends. How could one possibly control all that activity in the Universe?
Permit your passion, rather than belief systems, to light your way. In the darkness of sub-conscious and self-doubt you will not find your ability to surrender. You will want to take charge, believing you are always the driver of destination and may become even forceful and headstrong about how your life will feel and be. But, what if the lights are all turned off? How do you navigate in the dark? What tools would you use to move in such empty space? Who surrounds you?
It is the darkness that can cause fear, terror, and for some, escape into another dimension. It is at these moments that you are desperate to return to what will provide you comfort and guidance towards the Light. This is when you begin to feel passion again. You can see this in relationships, in the creative process, and throughout a person’s life cycle. You can see when passion is lost, and when it is found again. There are the people who light the way for all the others too. They are the angels, the guides, those that inspire and teach. They can appear like miracles, or simply at the right place and at the right time. They are the flickers of love and acceptance that help you to feel like you wish to keep moving in purpose. It is the baby born. The man or woman who entered your life and refused to leave. The stranger who, just by looking into your eyes, made you cry with uncertainty. Life sends us lights.
This Holiday season, be reminded your purpose is not lost. You are in the right spot whether you are stopped or wish to move forward. A New Year doesn’t have to be vastly different from where you are now in order for you to shine and find your way. This Self Love Sunday giver yourself permission to accept Purpose as a journey.