Hey, it’s Self Love Sunday. I realized something yesterday. I didn’t plan anything for Easter. I posted on Facebook the following:
It’s been a hectic week. I can usually juggle a lot. I always have. The ADD is real but its also more about the fact…
As an entrepreneur, I often work nights and weekends and holidays. I have been used to this schedule for many years but yesterday almost felt like a fail. If I had to compare myself to others, especially on the super-superficial Facebook, I could admit defeat and accept the worst-parent-ever Award for not participating in the traditional activities of said Holiday. But, I asked my daughter again today if she wanted to attend an event this evening, and she responded, “Mommy, I thought you said we could watch movies and stay home all day,” as she multi-tasks building her new Lego friends smoothie bar.
As a solo-parenting-indie mother and multi-tasker myself, I find that it’s easy to feel guilt and disappointment with not having the picture look at least close to perfect, the way my mother raised me and my siblings (pre-prison). Every Holiday was out of a postcard. Matching outfits, abundant dinners, gifts personally picked and sometimes hand-crafted. My mother was amazing that way. She was the ultimate multi-tasker back then. A foster parent with sometimes three babies to care for, along with her four children, a husband, a dog, hamsters, a growing garden, active church life, plus she was a pretty attractive woman. At least, that’s what I remember as a kid. Things were seemingly perfect on the outside.
In my own mothering experience there are times it’s looked good and times I have apparently failed. I work for others, and I develop business. My mother never had that pressure. I don’t have a nanny to sweep my kid off to the park so I can get a few hours of non-distracted work at home. I have to manage the work-at-home and work outside the home as well as parenting and all of the other activities that come along with being a productive and conscience adult.
Recently I attended the ICON15 Conference and I was inspired beyond what I knew was possible. I discovered persons like Sally Hogshead, Nick Nanton, Eric Martineau of InfusionSoft, Ryan Deiss, John Lee Dumas, Clay Collins, and a very inspiring Greg McKeown. A lot of these entrepreneurs had something in common. They sometimes failed, they sometimes lost money, they had families and didn’t always make time for them (like they wanted to) and almost all of them are now successful.
A fail in life can sometimes feel like “Business as Usual.” You try, you sacrifice, you put it out there, and your idea or promotion fails. Then you kick yourself for not coming up with more time, more skill, more creativity, focus or intelligence. But, a fail, as I learned last week at the InfusionSoft conference, can also turn out to be such a pivotable point for your life and business. “Success can become a catalyst for failure,” says Greg Mckeown. He wrote a book recently, called, ESSENTIALISM, which he describes as people having plateaus and how this can take them to the next level of contributing to life and business in a better way. He encourages us to do less, but better. And, Sally Hogshead said the same at the ICON15 conference, which I tweeted here:
— HolisticHummingbird (@HolisticCynthia) April 4, 2015
Business as Usual may need to become a different habit for you. Working nights, weekends and holidays may work for you but is probably not going to make you satisfied long term. Entrepreneurs need to have time to themselves and their families. Rory Vaden is one of the experts on time management and prioritization. He believes we do not need to prioritize but multiply our time – so we need to ask ourselves what we can do today to save more time tomorrow.
In “Business as Usual”, we constantly need to ask ourselves if we are making the right decisions, using our self awareness and self love. We can almost never find balance, it’s simply a goal. But, we can use our lessons in business and life as ways to move closer to our desires and wellness, in business and lifestyle. Self Love Sunday is just about that. Moving you closer to your desires and wellness.